12/13/2021

My dreams were interspersed with pain from my Achilles tendon and as the night wore on, nightmares became the theme. Nothing specific but there were two nightmares about my car, or a car. My driver side door was warped from some event and I couldn't fix it. Anxiety bubbled up, I was subsumed with pain, and I woke without a feeling of relief of evading that fate. Plus my heel hurt. Not like last week where I couldn't raise my right knee and put my foot flat on the bed without discomfort, but the feeling was intense. Need to mention that my car in the dream was a modern gray Honda Civic that I probably bought new in dream life. When I finally succumbed to sleep from exhaustion again, I think my brain was trying to riff on that theme but not much is recalled upon waking.

Monday began calling to find a doctor since I do not like the primary care physician I was saddled with after my previous doctor retired from practice. Back in 2010-2011 I had an Indian (dot, not feather) physician and he kept pushing gastric bypass surgery. First thing I heard out of my latest doctor, who is also an Indian, was a suggestion for gastric bypass surgery. I've never had an anglo doctor mention the procedure so I've twisted it up in my head as being an Indian thing.
Earlier on my birthday I read that Anne Rice died at the age of 80 and her obituary mentioned she had gastric bypass surgery and had an issue with bowel obstruction which typically comes with the procedure. I know I'm fat, I know I need to make profound changes rather than simply go under the knife in hopes of coming out the other side looking like a saggy chad. Also those who with gastric bypass are dependent on vitamins for the rest of their life because they're not getting enough to eat.
I found a place in Keyport, about the same distance from me as my previous doctor's office but it's not them. I tried to get an appointment with my current doctor but they told me, "LOL no open appointments until January 30, 2022."

Yes I'm aware I'm repeating myself.

Fortunately my manager sends the next day's work the night before, so I banged out the jobs as best as I could from home and I'm heading into the county at 9 a.m. to get shit done and arrive in Keyport at 2:30. Right now I'm listening to the BoneQuest Hi-Fi I produced before COVID cast its pall over humanity.

It's good.

P.S. it's Christmas-themed.

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