The following dream is a mix of a nightmare and a sex dream, respectively. I know one of my gentle readers could be triggered by the latter, so skip the purple stuff. For new readers, nightmares tend to be this color and sex-themed dreams are this color.

Went to bed stoned but I still remember a little bit of a dream. I was somewhere on vacation. This determination was made from the general mood of the dream. I walked back to my car when I saw the back door had been removed and someone left it leaning against the car. The other doors were intact and nothing appeared to have been stolen from the vehicle. The back seat was covered in papers and cassette tapes. After a moment of processing a rainbow of "what the fuck" feelings, I walked away from the car. When I returned someone had removed the two doors to the front seat.

I woke, brushed my teeth, and went back to sleep which tends to be my routine after smoking dope before bed.

I wake in the dream and find myself being the big spoon to Edna. She was receptive to my hands and pushing aside her pajamas, I got up and fetched a vibrator to use on her. Still can't imagine going down on her which is a shame. She spread her legs, I lifted one up to hold and caress while I finished her off and she squirted.


The middle of October is fast approaching and so are the high holidays. I've spent the high holidays at home many times when I lived in Colorado Springs, but I don't want to anymore. One thing is I've learned that my sister unwittingly triggers my anxiety. On top of that, she spends those holidays with my biological parents who are dead to me as of 2013. As for any kinds of holidays with my soon-to-be ex-wife and her family? I don't think that'd be appropriate, nor would I think either side would be comfortable in each others presence. Reckon I still have time to figure something out, or make peace with spending holidays alone, but the seed is already in my head.

mundane stuff

I am staying in Toms River to take care of the cats while the soon-to-be ex-wife is away. Only 'til Monday evening. After that, I'll be here after work to clean cat boxes, freshen water and food for my babies. I hope I'm not deluding myself and everything I see about their behavior says they truly miss me. On the bright side, there's free food for me here.

Valid xHTML Transitional!