2/13/2022

Saturday was not that good of a day, but it was bright and sunny as early spring compared to last weekend. I know I'm ruminating and hovering around the black hole of depression because I'm looking to the past and missed opportunities. Not to mention trying to figure out where I fucked up because deep down I feel like I need to be in control of my life rather than leave it to the vagaries of fate.

Spoke with two online acquaintances. Too cautious to refer to them as friends. Contacted someone from a few years ago and it was a surprise. Most of the day was spent waiting for a new acquaintance to get back to me, but they're preoccupied with preparing for a sports game tomorrow. But for forward-thinking and trying to take control of my life, I sent out a few cold messages to people. Cold as in unsolicited, not as in the degree and intensity of heat present in a substance or object.