10/2/2022
Leah and I spent a little time together on Friday night. We went to Costco where she used her mom's membership to buy stuff and I acquired a big container of laundry detergent for $15. Fifteen bucks! We had a cheap dinner and talked a little bit about life and the marriage.
On our way back to return her mother's membership card she asked me if I knew who the guy was that I met when we last went out to dinner together. Catch up with the entry from September 19th if you're out of the loop. As soon as she began the conversation and was prepared to go down that path I asked her, "How smart do you think I am?"
"You're very smart."
"You have your answer. Please don't go any further."
"But you said you're not in love with me anymore and it shouldn't..."
"You have had more time to process things. You've had more experiences. Me? Not so much." She wanted to continue whereupon I asked her again to not continue down this path.
I should've reminded her that when I told her that I'm not in love with her anymore on the 19th that I cried a bit because saying that still feels like a betrayal, and she did reach across the table to hold my hand. Still have a lot I'm trying to unpack.
went out
On Saturday night I went out to Johnny Mac's and reckon I did well. During the first hour a woman came up to talk with me, then I spoke with her friend. Nothing serious or deep, just chit-chat because they asked what I was doing at the time. I was writing letters in Esperanto to my friends in Arizona and South Korea. At the time I was sitting on a high-boy stool which became uncomfortable but from my vantage point I saw there were some regular tables sitting empty across the bar, so I waddled on over and set up camp. I wrote a private diary entry which I might transcribe anyway and once again outlined one of my weird fiction stories.
Much to my surprise I discovered that someone liked one of my photos on Hinge then wound up talking with them for the rest of the night. As a bonus this skinny blonde woman who was sitting at a table across from mine came over to ask what I was writing about, then I gave her an earful of my odd and convoluted plot about a cat. She told me how she's going for her Master's in English and appreciates weird stuff and reckons there oughta be more weird stuff in the world considering how homogenous society has become over the years.
On the other hand, maybe society has always moved towards homogeneity and any perceived differentiation is just an illusion brought about my one's youthful perspective. I gave her my card then she mentioned how her husband was sitting behind pillar at her table and I shrugged inwardly. At least I spoke with yet another woman.
On top of that, I did order a pineapple juice and a Sea Dragon from a bartenderess so it looks like I spoke with five women on Saturday. Even if one was virtual and probably not going to go anywhere since she described herself as 'high maintenance' after she asked if I would be able to take her into the city for dinner and a show.
