11/26/2023

More writing from Mastodon

"Pipi! Don't feed Miss Stinky to the cat!"
"She just wants to play."
"Miss Stinky is a tar-an-tu-la. Cats don't eat tarantulas."
"I know, they just want to play Auntie Pupu!"
For the next hour Pipi and Pupu watched Miss Stinky and Pickles play ping pong.

Please note this Pipi is not the other instance of someone named Pipi in a later post.

"Halt! Papers, please."
"Papers? Isn't it all digital nowadays?"
The guard's face reddened.
"Or is your country so poor because only the oligarchs have money that you have to get documentation on paper that costs more than if you digitized it."
The ham-sized fist with kielbasa-sausage fingers gripped his Makarov.
"I mean it's enough to make one wonder if the glorious October revolution meant anything. 'Kill the royalty! Okay now some cossack peasant with a silver tongue has all the money."

"You are free to go, devotchka" the guard growled through clenched yellow teeth.
"But you didn't ans..."
"Thank you comrade! She is not very bright and talks too much" laughed Mr. McCracken as he pushed Titi across the border.
Several meters away Titi staged whispered, "You don't think he knows about the virus I tucked you-know-where... do you?"

If Phil sighed any harder, his soul would've floated up to heaven like the vapor of his breath in the sub-zero cold. "Don't mention the vial again, Titi, otherwise there'll be more trouble than we'll rouse after infecting you-kno..."
"Vladimir Putin?" She shrieked like a teenaged girl in the audience of the Ed Sullivan show featuring the Beatles.
McCracken's dainty, soft hand covered her warm mouth. "Yes, Vladimir Putin is the leader of New Russia. Let's salute his picture when we next see one.

The opulently-appointed dining chamber was in disarray from Titi's acrobatic martial arts. Her dermasteel was dented in places, torn in others, while Putin's war-form roared from teh floor below.
"My, he does get testy when he finds the samovar's been played with."
"CRUSH YOU! RIP HEAD! DANCE IN BLOOD. PUTIN STRONG!. TINY GIRL DIE!"

McCracken heaved himself from the debris and rubble of the Kremlin's living quarters. "Good job, Titi."
The gyndroid was a wreck. All niceties of human appearance were gone. Eyes glowed an actinic blue from a grinning metal skull which still spoke with the sprightly voice. "My arm! I need my left arm! That bad old man tore it off."
McCracken sighed and straightened up, "Don't worry, he shoved it up my ass for safe keeping."

Titi emerged from the clean room, prettier than ever. Brighter blue eyes, an inferno of red hair swirling in the laminar air flow, a tight-fitting bodysuit leaving little to nothing to the imagination. She jumped when she caught herself in the mirror.
"Eeee! I'm prettier!" she squealed through her hands. Then her mood darkened, "W-what's that?"
She pointed at the burnt skeletal frame sitting lifeless behind her.
"Oh, that's your old self. It'll be recycled for parts."

"You. Will. Not!" Titi ran to the old chassis, hugged the servors and armatures. "You're going to make her my newest best friend!" Her eyes fluttered at Phil. "Pweease?"
"B-but..."
Her voice deepened to a G flat taking on the texture of whiskey, gravel, and cigars. "Remake her, Phil."
"Bob! We got a rebuild!"

Pipi's eyes fluttered open, shining bright green, "Happy Birthday!"
"Eeeee!" squealed Titi. "YouremynewbestfriendandyournameisnowPipi!"

Dr. Tongtianlong Rh.D ran into the room to find Titi and Pipi hugging, he could only hear them squealing "sisters".
"Mr. McCracken, it is very unlucky to have only two droidinoj. With spare parts I have created a third." He pressed his phone.
Yello's "Oh Yeah" blasted through the laboratory making Pipi and Titi hush up in surprise.
"Numbah Tree!" and Bob gestured behind him.

Four foot tall and built like a brick shithouse, Didi was blessed in front and back but it was all myomer alloy and dermasteel.

"Happy Birthday! I'm Didi!"

Antarctic wind roared like Satan's farts below Cocytus through the southern hemisphere night. Titi, Pipi, and Didi's resolute progress through the unforgiving winter kept them sane.
"Should I feel cold?" asked Didi.
Titi laughed, "Only if you want to."
"Okay" chirped Didi. A beat later Didi toppled over into a drift as her sisters watched. Titi and Pipi loomed over her, "Cold enough for ya?"
Didi reached up and ran her hands over her giant bosom. "I c-can't feel my nipples."

notes about the above writing

Haoyu "Bob" Tongtianlong, the NSA's chief roboticist and developer of the droidinoj.
Philip McCraken, head of special operations at the NSA and saddled with managing Titi, Pipi, and Didi.
Titi is the nominal leader of the girls who currently lack a name for their group. She has the latest chassis with ceramic armatures and carbon fiber myomer making her a deadly fighting machine. Her appearance is a 20-something redhead who is height-weight proportionate with blue eyes. Her favorite ice cream is pistachio.
Pipi was built on Titi's old titanium chassis. While her hardware might be a little outdated, it's durable and cheap to replace. On top of that her wetware is state-of-the-art since it's small enough to be installed on the old substate making her "the brains". Pipi is very sensitive to jokes about her name. Her appearance is that of a skinny blonde woman with green eyes. Pipi has a weakness for rabbits.
Didi has the appearance of a robust and well-blessed young woman with dark hair and darker eyes. Standing a hair under 150 centimeters she is the shortest and the youngest and considered to be the baby by Titi and Pipi. Despite that, Didi is the most durable and strongest and youngest, yet clumsiest of their team. Didi once wrestled an elephant and won for a bar bet. Didi is a Cancer.
Haoyu means "Vast Universe". Tongtianlong means "dragon on the road to heaven".

Phil McCracken... I don't believe that needs explanation.
Actually it does since Phillip means "Horse lover" and McCracken is derived from "Mac Reachtain" who was a Gaelic noble from the middle ages.
It's certainly not a joke about gay anal sex.

and the story continues

"What should we call ourselves?"
"Did Phil really say we can call ourselves anything?"
"Yup" Titi and Pipi agreed in unison.
Didi spread her arms, "The Rack Pack!" Then Didi and Titi looked at Pipi, "Hm... maybe not." Pipi crossed her arms and blushed, "How about The Furies? They have a mythological basis of three sisters who..."
Didi and Titi's eyes glazed over as Pipi waxed eloquent on her choice. "...and feared by all because they controled everyone's destiny!"

"Well we're sure as heck not calling ourselves 'The Divas'." Titi rolled her eyes with her sisters. "Even if we're the Doomsday Divas?"
"Oh honey, we're here to save the world not end it."
Didi burst into tears triggering the motherly protocols of her sisters.
Phil and Bob, watching from the command center, looked at each other. "This is going to take all night, isn't it?"
Bob laughed, "All night? More like all weekend."

"Wild Thangs!"
"Super Girls!"
"The Babe Bunch!"
"Hell's Honeys!"
"Femforce!"
"Hell On Heels!"

With a blush, Pipi whispered, "The Pussy Posse." "What?!"
"Did she say what I think she did?"
"Say it again."
Pipi looked down at her feet and with a pout, "Pussy Posse."

"How about Ratchet and Skank?" asked Didi.
"Do you even know what's a skank?"
Didi grinned, "Yup, it's one of those little green lizards that climb on the screen door in summer!"
Pipi snorted and whispered the real definition into her sister's ear.

Chad leaned in close to Pipi. Her olfactory sensors began to overload but went offline before failure thanks to the pool of cologne he swam through, "Why..." his rich brown voice paused for effect, "... do they call you Pippi?"
"It's 'Pipi' and I'm a positronic personoid. I can calculate pi to seven and a half billion digits in base 26. The name "Chad" first appears in pi at position 14534 and appears 19864 times in the first 200 million digits of pi."
He blinked. "Uh... I see. Wanna..." he whispered something.
Didi and Titi stood outside the chaos of emergency lights at the bar hoping Pipi was okay.

The jailhouse used reinforced steel bars. Those would part like the Red Sea if Didi look crosseyed at them. For Titi those bars were like unwrapping a gift on Christmas morning. Same goes for Pipi, it'd still be easy but she was a people pleaser and consumed with guilt. The EMTs said that guy's jaw was shattered.
"You got five minutes, ladies." Officer Bertha Sticklebottom slammed the heavy door behind her.

Bars folded faster than Superman on laundry day as Didi wiggled her behind against Pipi's cell.
Titi whispered, "C'mon!"
"No."
"She'll be back any minute!"
"Three minutes and twenty four seconds."
"Come ooooon. Phil will make this go away."
"No, I did a bad thing and must be punished." Pipi folded her arms and turned her face away from her sisters.