I tripped on magic mushrooms this Sunday. They were from 2017, but I put every remaining one into the blender with some pineapple juice. Chugged down the concoction at 11:27 a.m., took a shower, and began feeling loopy while drying myself off.

Aphasia descended upon me, but a strange kind of aphasia. I would only speak Esperanto rather than English. Funny bit, I was doing quite well talking aloud in Esperanto and remembering the accusative.

Sat out on the back deck, closed my eyes, watched as the overworld filled with green gel through which great bubbles floated up towards heaven. When I opened my eyes, the world was still normal. Closing my eyes again, I received a lapdance from Shiva. She was wearing a little tube top, never touched me, and at a juncture my point of view zoomed back which revealed the entire background of this reality was made up of dancing Shivas creating an undulating background which I equated to the Cosmic Microwave Background.

After a while I began to feel hot, so I went to bed and had a very interesting experience. My entire soul was black sediment kicked up, and the purpose of laying in bed was for it to settle down for the first time in a long time. Reveries came and went, I saw shifting Stars of David below me, and watched black creatures with rainbow biolight strips swim in formation throughout a vast ocean. Every now and again an anxious thought from real life would intrude, I’d “wake”, shift my body, and begin to settle in once again.

Leah came in and sounded like Charlie Brown’s teacher. She tried to talk to me but I couldn’t understand her one whit. After what seemed like hours, she got up and left because I was unresponsive.

Got up again, sat outdoors, watched birds fly past me in slow motion and felt in the flow of the natural world. From here, life became a waking dream. Unlike past trips, which were almost always hero’s journeys, this one was more subdued and I’m grateful because a hero’s journey would not have been kind to me. Either the mushroom knows, or my body knows, how to process psilocybin and how much psilocybin to process. Or they were just old and I lucked out, or pineapple juice may have a deleterious effect upon the potency of psilocybin.

I accomplished next to nothing on Sunday, go me, and for this I am grateful. I plan on growing my own very soon, and look forward to visiting the outer solar system to talk to god.

Chris S.
Anomalist, esperantist, cyclist, typist, dodecaphile, ailurophile, and oneiromancer. Chris lives near the shore with his wife, cats, and the Jersey Devil in his backyard.

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